Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Differing Points of Mew


Okay, so I know that we all have our differences, and that sometimes we can't see eye to eye, and that that's why the French invented the marvelous saying, "Viva la difference!" but still, there are just some things that are much better when seen from my point of mew and not from the point of mew of this person I live with, because, just between mew and me, she sometimes has her head firmly up her butt.

So, dig this. I was doing my, um, thinking outside the box, pawing at the pretty rug in front of the sofa, and she was doing this stuff called "work" (I don't know what that means, but I will consult my Mewriam-Webster a bit later!) at her desk, and she decided to stick her snout in where it wasn't wanted OR needed. She jumped up, like she often does, and dashed over.

"What are mew doing?" she said. Instantly suspicious.

"Mew have to ask?" I thought. But said nothing.

I looked up at her, blew a smoke ring, and ran into the corner by my window seat. I started pawing the hardwood floor there. I can just as easily use wood as I can wool.

"Now what are mew doing?" she said. "No! Stop it! Don't do that! Go in mewr box! Go in mewr box! Go in mewr BOX!" (Apparently she thinks if mew say something three times, it magically happens.)

"This is not Oz, Dorothy," I muttered.

I looked up at her and arched an eyebrow, and scampered under the antique china cabinet. And started furiously pawing the hardwood under there, too.

"No! Mew can't do that there, either! Come on! Go to mewr box!"

I decided to act like I didn't know what a "box" was and scampered back to the corner I had vacated just moments earlier. I wedged myself into the corner, sitting straight up, my back to her. I know she thought it was cute that I was acting like I was punished, like I was a dunce or something, and I half expected her to fashion a pointy dunce cap out of construction paper, Elmer's Glue, yarn, and glitter, but she didn't.

And then I deposited my present, in full mew of her horrified eyes.

"What is mewr problem?" I said. "Just because we're Mewish doesn't mean I can't hide the eggs for Easter? Fine. Then I'll leave them here where mew can see them before the holiday!"

She's such a SPOILSPORT. :-(


  1. "...blew a smoke ring..." You're funny Shana. And, I ain't gonna eat any of your chocolate eggs. Heh, heh.

    But, seriously. Have you decided you don't like your litter anymore? Is it a new brand? A texture of perfumery smell that annoys you? Are you one of those kitties that wants the litter box to not have one poop in it EVER? What is it that you are trying to tell us? These are questions that I and countless others are asking.

  2. ...texture or perfumery smell...

    Sheesh. I can't get good help around here.

  3. Shana, you are so funny! We got lots of laughs out of your post:) Hahaha

  4. That sounds very funny! I bet your mommy was horrified! Humans don't appreciate poop like we do!

  5. ....could mew post photo evidence pleez.....

  6. Well, Shana, you have painted a vivid word picture of the conflict between you and your human. We all wish you luck and success in your dealings with her!