Basket case!

Meowllo!

It's been quite some time, this I meow, but that doesn't mean that I don't make up posts in my head when I have nothing better to mew. I just don't get around to typing them as much I know I should. I know that's no excuse, because I have access not only to the desktop computer but a really nice laptop and a spiffy iPad as well. I suppose I have to just admit it: I'm lazy.

But, mew see, I'd really just prefer to lounge around in my new basket. Do mew like it? The person I live with received it as part of a Valentine's Day gift that her new boyfriend (OMG, he's so cute!!!) gave her, but I knew I could put it to better use than she could and decided to pretend that I thought it was a gift for ME. I waited until the boyfriend went home and then I crept into the basket and settled in. Of course, once she saw how cute I looked, there was no way she would ever be able to use it for something stupid, like storing stockings.

I just have to remember, this is NOT an annex to my litter box!

Is this thing on?

Meowllo!

Is this thing on? *taptaptap*

I apologize for not being around much in the last -- oh my god, almost four months? Really? It's been that long? I can't believe it! Time flies when you're napping about 23 hours a day. Rip Van Winklemew, much? Holy moly!

I have nothing new to report, except I do have ONE little gripe that I have to get off my furry black chest because it's been rankling me for a while and I think some of mew may relate.

Why oh why why WHY does this person-thing I live with insist on meowing back at me when I speak? What IS that? Is that supposed to be cute and/or funny? Or is it condescending, the way I suspect? When I meow by my food bowl, why must she meow back instead of just reaching for the food and giving me what I want? When I look up at her when she's working and meow just to say meowllo, is it really necessary for her to meow back? And it's not even like she meows right anyway. I do NOT sound like that. My meow is like a field of happy daffodils, bright and sunny and fresh. Her imitation is as fresh and lively as plastic flowers.

Thank mew. I feel better meow.

For once, it's not all about me me me (yow)

Meowllo.

I don't have the spirit for my usual exclamation point, so the period at the end of the Meowllo greeting will have to suffice.

I am very sad, and trying to keep myself from crying all day, because the past couple of days one of the cats who is lucky enough to live with my mom's friends Allison, Piglet, and Grover suddenly got sick and has a fever and is in the hospital and it's not looking as good for him as we want, even though we are all praying or sending telepathic good vibes or just thinking really really hard about how much we love Vito -- whichever one suits us! -- and how much we want him to get better. Some of us, like my mom and I, haven't ever even meet the little guy, but we know that if he's hanging around with Allison and Piglet and Grover he's gotta be pretty damned amazing!!!

The only good thing about this is that my mom has been hugging me extra these past couple of days. But I'm too cool to admit that I like this. So, even though I want her to keep doing it, I have to feign disinterest and pretend to struggle out of her arms. I do have a reputation to uphold, mew know what I mean?

PLEASE get better, Vito. We all love mew!!!

Mewsing in Action

Meowllo!

I apologize for not updating my blog for quite some time. I have been very busy being a supermodel and lying around my mom's apartment honing my craft. I have also been busy pretending to be her personal assistant and forgetting to tell her that the price of postage has gone up again and that she needs to buy new pens. I have been spending a fair amount of time out on the back patio, sunning myself the way supermodels do, in preparation for a photo spread that a nice man named Mew Heffner said will bring me the recognition I so richly deserve.

More soon! I promise! Meow!

Rest in beautiful peace, Molly :-(

Meowllo.

I am very sad. My sister/aunt, Molly, who lives with my mom's mom and sister, left this world yesterday. I am incapable of tears, because I am a cat, but that doesn't mean I am not devastated. I hear she was the sweetest, gentlest, loveliest girl around. I miss her even though I never met her.

Sleep sweetly, Molly! You are missed already. :-(

Tomcat Jones!

Meowllo!

I was really mad at my mom yesterday for abandoning me to hang out all day with Piggy and Grover and their mom, Allison. But when I saw this video clip of some of their shenanigans, I was THRILLED to have been left out of the so-called fun. (Allison works the puppet-cat as my mom provide vocal hilarity. Piglet looks like he wishes death on both of them. And can mew blame him???)

Mewterial Girl

Meowllo!

Contrary to what mew might think, I am not a mewterial girl. I don't ask for much. However, I am not a complete traitor to catdom, in that I am very picky about the few things that I do ask for, such as food (no peas, please, as I have documented before) and where I don't appreciate being touched (don't fiddle with my paws!), and how long I will allow mew to hold me when mew're standing (no more than 24 seconds). Also, I have the glower and glare down pat, and I excel at being not only aloof but actually turning my back toward mew to demonstrate that I am actively ignoring mew.

But when I saw the item pictured here, while doing some research on the internet this morning, I almost got as excited as a dog does when mew just look his way. Here is the description from Target's website:

Inspired by an old-fashioned gumball machine, the Kitty Kitchen Food and Treat Dispenser invites your cat to help herself to a tasty reward. Made with a turn-wheel that can be easily spun with the touch of a paw, the sturdy design is simple for most cats to learn to use. (A diploma is included for when your cat masters this trick.) Place on a countertop for a whimsical addition to your kitchen or pantry. Dispenser is red, black and gray, with colorful fabric accents on the turn-wheel.

Although I am deeply in love with this thing, I do not appreciate that Target thinks there are some of us who wouldn't be able to learn to use it. We are cats, after all. I will be happy to receive my diploma, though.

What I can't figure out, though, is how to get my mom to get this for me (she's going to Target on Saturday!) without actually asking for it. Any advice???